The Fire Is Within Us, Too....

It comes as a great shock around the age of 5, 6, or 7,

to discover that the flag to which you have pledged

allegiance, along with everybody else, has not

pledged allegiance to you. ... It comes as a great shock

to discover that the country which is your birthplace and

to which you owe your life and your identity, has not, in its

whole system of reality, evolved a place for you.

- James Baldwin (1965)

It’s raining … and I’m seething, even though I’m in my happy place. I just can’t shake an historical legacy about which I’m learning anew. So, though I’m enthralled, engrossed and enlightened by Nicholas Buccola’s new book The Fire Is Upon Us, I’m also appalled and infuriated: in setting a full and revealing context for the book’s central focus, the 1965 debate between James Baldwin and William Buckley at the Cambridge Union, the author rightly reviews the history of each of these protagonists … and being reminded of the Buckley’s record and legacy of insouciant, sophist racism is, in a word, enraging, especially because it presages and echoes the themes of its modern day complement.

It’s not just that Buckley was Privileged and pompous, it’s also that, for the most part until that day in February, 1965, and since, his racism has largely gone both unacknowledged and unchallenged. So reading of his life and work before this fateful encounter exposes one to a person ultimately utterly unworthy of the renown that he earned in his lifetime as well as that accorded to him still by (too) many today. While there is no question that he was a genius at wrapping inhumanity in eloquence, it’s nonetheless dispiriting to review it in all of its inglorious depth and profundity.

Simply put, William F. Buckley, Jr., was a racist (and a chauvinist, a bigot, a religiocentrist, etc.) a$$hole and that his legacy continues to bedevil the lives of The Other in our society to this day is a damning indictment of us. But it’s also an opportunity: if we expose ourselves to the evil that this singularly loquacious and influential inhuman fomented, we can learn from it, especially how to address and eradicate it in the future. This will be a real challenge, because, every day, we regular folk-cum-social justice warriors will have to inoculate ourselves from this evil in order for us and others to transcend it.

Even now, as I write these words, they come slowly and painfully: Mr. Buckley is such a horrible figure that it’s hard to refrain from spewing one’s own invective while reviewing his. It pains me greatly that though he is dead, his ideas, so damaging to so many, are not, and therefore they continue to provide cover to the powerful in our own time to demean so many of those whom they’re supposed to serve.

I’ll admit that, in the spirit of ‘opposition research’ and largely in the ’80s, I used to read his primary publication, the journal The National Review, from time to time, so exploring its roots in greater detail is not an entirely unfamiliar endeavor … but is a most challenging one: to make it plain, I find myself having to remind myself constantly not to engage in the profanity that this exploration engenders involuntarily. (In fact, the only person about whom I find myself saying “This MF!?!” as much or even more is 45, another inhuman who, unfortunately, has proven himself utterly unworthy and is harming us even more greatly at present.)

To study Buckley’s firm embrace of White Supremacy – which he justified as being, in Mr. Buccola’s words, “contingent and temporary” rather than “absolute and permanent” – is, for any compassionate and empathetic human being – but especially for a Person of Color – an exercise in forbearance and forcible self-restraint. His (sense of) Privilege is profound, especially in its misguided, insulting and demeaning paternalism.

As the author points out, he was possessed of a “long-held belief in the inferiority of black people” which led him to seek “to form a philosophy of racial hierarchy that he hoped might be deemed more respectable than what was being peddled by the ‘coarse’ demagogues in the Ku Klux Klan.” Hence, he crafted a racially elitist position in which though “he rejected the idea that blacks were biologically inferior,” nonetheless he deemed that theirs was of a type “‘cultural and educational,’ and as a result, the superior white community had the right and duty to uphold the standards of civilization until blacks could show themselves capable of casting ‘a thoughtful vote.’”

I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that, as I read this passage, I literally exclaimed out loud “Who the f@#k are you, Bill Buckley (to make such a determination)?!?” Thankfully, there was no one else within earshot at the time, although I did find myself apologizing silently to my late and beloved (and very southern and proper) mother, who raised me better than this.…

To return to the book, it is a story perhaps too well told, as, while it informs, it infuriates due to its clearly exhaustive research and generally well-written prose. That we don’t come to the full story of the event that precipitates it until well past its halfway point is a testament to this. But it’s a hard read for anyone of a moderate (let alone progressive) bent and especially so for a liberal Baldwin fan like myself. While I understand that in order to tell the full (and a good) story one has to examine a reality from multiple perspectives, it takes a formidable amount of self-control to parse the passages on Buckley and to be exposed to his Privileged inhumanity in painstaking (though appropriate) detail.

And, yet, if you’re a believer in social justice, you must, for in it lies not only the enemy’s territory to be mapped but a like-minded genius and trailblazer’s approach to doing so … especially so that we can carry forward this continuing fight grounded both in historical and present realities. In the Age of 45, we’ve been reminded just how much more work remains in this regard – admittedly, often appallingly and invariably damagingly so – which means that we need to prepare ourselves to play the long game successfully … especially as regressive efforts increase in the face of the continuing and accelerating Blackening and Browning of America. Is it not reasonable to expect this dying, racist, sexist, xenophobic, etc., regime to fight even more fiercely as minority status inexorably approaches for those who’ve historically held the reins of power in this country?

So I continue to explore the depths of the depravity and inhumanity as embodied in Mr. Buckley’s life and work, as it prepares me to deal with his successors in this present day. And I am mindful that, though costly, this battle isn’t voluntary … at least not if one truly aspires to live the American Dream and bequeath it to our progeny. Thus, I invite you to join me on this bracing journey of exploration and share that it really is OK to drop as many “This MF!?!”s as necessary along the way….

This is not an act of God. We're dealing with a society

made and ruled by men. ... It is a terrible thing for an

entire people to surrender to the notion that one-

ninth of its population is beneath them.

- James Baldwin (1965)

We, the fortunate few....

With you my love we're going to raid the future

With you my love we're going to stick up the past

We'll hold today to ransom 'til our quartz clock stop until yesterday.

- Vivian Stanshall and Steve Winwood

Arc of a Diver

As another college reunion approaches - and I've taken a vacation which affords me some time to drop off the grid and reflect - I'm perusing the Report to catch up with the lives of my classmates in the past five years, which is a pursuit that's alternatively gladdening and saddening, as I find that life is at middle age. I look forward to seeing some of them again when we gather in a month's time, but I'll also perceive some noticeable absences, including both folks who can't make it back to our alma mater that weekend and peers who've gone on to glory long before what we'll always believe should have been their time....

I consider it one of the great privileges of my life to have gone through such a rich, transformative and crucible period with such an incredible group of people. When we met, we were all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, naïvely ambitious and convinced that we would change the world someday soon. Now, for the most part, we've become those future pillars of the community that we envisioned ourselves to be, albeit a little heavier, with a little less and/or greyer hair and decidedly less style than that to which we aspired in our youth. (Hey, it was the 80's after all....)

And though we attended one of the world's most elite universities, the proverbial golden ticket if there ever was one, the reality is that life has affected us just as much as everyone who hasn't been so lucky, either then or now. Yes, some of our classmates have founded companies, made millions (while donating a generous portion to our alma mater) and otherwise triumphed in business. Or they've become renowned professors and experts to whom others turn for wisdom and guidance. Or they've become among the most trailblazing and innovative professionals, especially doctors, lawyers and consultants. Or, in one case, a US Representative and, in another, a US Senator. Of course, many have lived less glamorous but nonetheless accomplished lives, about which we'll hear when we gather again in person at our reunion … or if we read the Class Report beforehand.

In fact, we've reached that stage in life where some of us have kids who have themselves graduated from college (including our alma mater) or are in it at present, while others' progeny are at tender ages that those of us with older children remember fondly and yet don't want to revisit. It's a point along our paths at which virtually all of us have garnered a realistic sense of our capacity to contribute to this world and yet age leads us to wonder about what lies ahead with a mix of tamped expectation and just a touch of concern. This is, in reality, a reasonable perspective: after all, statistics tell us that we likely have more of our journey in the rearview mirror than on the open road before us.

And while most everyone has experienced the vagaries of fate that inevitably attach themselves to adult life, on the whole, we've had good lives and, virtually to a person, can count ourselves among the fortunate few. Which is what makes the premature demises of an appreciable number of our peers so sad.…

For example, among my friends, Jacquie Cook died in a moped accident in France between our freshman and sophomore years; Roland Heacock, on his way to medical school after a graduation that was just a week or two away, was permanently injured in a car accident and passed away little more than a decade later never having had the chance to fulfill the promise that was so evidently his; and other friends - like Desiree and Craig and my track buddy John O'Brien (known as "Obie" to his friends) and the incredible and accomplished Bill Patterson, to name but a few - are no longer here to celebrate with us and to enrich our lives as they did during that glorious gauntlet of multi-faceted growth. Fortunate though they may have been in their youth, a long life was not one of their endowments, a reality for which we who survive are meaningfully poorer, especially their families (including the ones that some of them didn't live long enough to have).

Many assumed - including, I suspect, most of us - that because our lives were charmed in our youth, so, too, would be the rest of our journey. But for far too many of those we knew and loved, this was not to be.…

This, I have learned, is one of life's greatest lessons: no matter how gilded the path, into each and every life triumph and tragedy will enter, the primary differences between us reflecting the balance of these two that fate ensures none of us can ever anticipate.…

So I hope that Willy chooses to return to the site of our youthful hijinks so that we can reminisce about our shared affinity for Stevie Winwood, one of the many prized gifts from him that also include an improptu wardrobe consulting session before his first college date. And I hope that Lance will choose to come this time so that we can relive some of the many great times that we shared (the majority of which, of necessity, will have to be sanitized if family is near). It would be great to catch up with Rondo, a pleasure I've had too infrequently in the intervening years. Hopefully, my beloved track buddy Mark Henry and I can reminisce about our exploits (but not replicate them, as sprinting is not a good idea for either of us now). And I hope that I get to spend some quality time with Eric Steven, with whom I was cool but not that close during our youth but to whom social media has bound me, thankfully, in the past half-decade; and John Tormey, whom I couldn't pick out of a lineup but whose online persona is invariably mirth-inducing and often profound. And (now) Dr. Alan Jackson, with whom I shared my first Uno's pizza so long ago, and (now) Dr. Stephen Taylor, the first 18-year-old I ever met who didn't have a driver's license (because he was a New York City [read = subway] kid). And Curtis and Errol and Fred, whose fertile minds stretched mine beneficially so long ago. So, too, with Jamie and Bruce and Keith and the two Terrys - and Frank and/or Jon? - and many other brothers in time with whom I spent long hours envisioning our futures and thoroughly enjoying our then-present moments. And Susan and Paola and Sarah and Glenda and Jennifer and Erica and Eva and Julie and all of the other fierce classmates who convinced me a generation ago that the future was indeed female. And if I don't see them, I will wish them well telepathically as I so often do now, the memories of our shared developmental experiences and escapades ever-emblazoned upon my soul.

And yet another bit of fun: I'll get to introduce my wife to many of the legends about whom she's been regaled, since she and the kids and I were only able to make a single event at my previous reunion (though I did manage to keep my streak of attending all of them intact by doing so).

As I prepare to rejoin these incredible people, I am ever more thankful for the influences that they've had in my life, both large and small. I treasure who they used to be and am excited to learn more about who they've become. And I pray that whatever the future holds, each of us will find profound meaning in the moments that lie ahead of us, however many they will be. What I can say unequivocally now is that each of these experiences of the eternal now with which we're gifted will enhance the blessings that we've been in each other's lives in and remind us just how fortunate we've been to make our journeys together, both then and now.…

When we were young, we couldn't wait to grow up.

As we got older, how we wish time would slow down just a little.

 - Anonymous

The 'Quiet Costs' of White Supremacy

Privilege is when you think that
something's not a problem
because it's not a problem
for you personally.

- David Gaider

I am an Affirmative Action baby, and a proud and unapologetic one at that. The college cheating scandal that came to light this week illustrates why: funny how we didn't hear but one of the traditional twin narratives that typically accompany - and purport to summarize the criticism of - Affirmative Action, that it displaces more qualified people and that it creates a sense of inferiority in its recipients. I'll let you guess which one of these has been left out of the ensuing, (supposedly) mortified (and, in reality, mortifying) conversation.…

No, Lori Laughlin's daughters aren't the least bit perturbed by how they were admitted to a college for which they did not otherwise qualify. Given that one of them was a budding YouTube sensation, I think it's fair to conclude that she doesn't feel stigmatized by her unearned good fortune. And now that the scandal has broken, we haven't heard a peep about her feeling apologetic, have we? Don't get me wrong, I realize that it's hard to be as connected from a billionaire's yacht, but still.…

Maybe it's just me, but I wasn't the least bit shocked by this week's revelations. They were simply the latest confirmation for me of an ugly reality about our beloved country that we refuse to acknowledge: America has always treated the rich and powerful - who, it must be noted, are disproportionately white - far better and, in fact, provided them with a different set of rules by which they could live and prosper more easily than the rest of us.

In fact, the greatest sense of entitlement in the history of this country does not attach to the poor and deserving who need our social safety net in order to survive, but to the denizens of the other end of the spectrum in our society who've always been accustomed to virtually unfettered and unlimited access and opportunity, irrespective of their qualifications. And, in a cruel but revealing twist, it is they who have claimed the mantle of meritocracy and enforced it so brutally against others who would presume to rise above their station. That the rest of us have had to make our way in this world and our climb up the rungs of our society by facing questions as to our qualifications and by forging ahead into the strong prevailing headwind of supposed meritocracy - how cynical, hypocritical and utterly false this pretense has been proven to be yet again this week! - is one of these 'quiet costs' of White Supremacy. I've never heard of George W. Bush being asked to apologize for his Yale and Harvard educations, but I and so/too many of my friends have been challenged in this way over the years. I wonder why?

(We all know - but far fewer acknowledge - that the reason is one word: Privilege.)

And, truth be told, I've never bought into the inferiority thing, even though my belief in myself was challenged constantly when I was younger. It wasn't about being Black or unqualified. For me, it was about competing at the very highest levels in our society. After all, I'm 'just' a bus mechanic's and librarian's son from inner-city Detroit, right? When I doubted myself at Harvard, it wasn't because of my African-American heritage, but because, in the parlance of the place, so many of my classmates were so 'wicked smart.' As were so many of my colleagues on Wall Street.

But, then again, so am I: Lord knows it takes a whole lot of smarts - in both book and street forms - and moxie to make it out of the Murder Capital of the World in the 1970s to the Ivy League, Wall Street and beyond. And I found the same to be true of so many of my fellow first-generation mainstreamers (whether they were Black like me or brown or white or of any other shade ... or gender or sexual orientation or religion or national origin or...). Actually, it turns out that our race/difference was, has been and is irrelevant; what has always mattered most is the level of cultural fluency that one is able to evidence in the most elite settings. In other words, can you fit in and then flourish?

Which brings us back to the reality that the biggest challenge is access … to educational and professional opportunity, to a better life, etc. So while I condemn their methods, I understand the motivations of the wealthy and powerful parents who've been exposed - and, indeed, charged - this week: they want what everyone wants, a great/better life for their children. That they would have to bend the rules illegally for their progeny was simply an inconvenience to the Privilege (read = Entitlement) that they've felt and to which they've become accustomed. And, again, funny how no one has raised the cost of the undue pressure that having this access has had on their children. Hmmm....

No, only the Black and brown (etc.) recipients of formal Affirmative Action - and to an appreciably lesser extent, female ones - have been subjected to the 'inferiority tax,' yet another pernicious 'quiet cost' of White Supremacy (in its most dominant form, that of [Patriarchal] White Male Hegemony). Hey, guess what, America? It turns out the rest of you are figuring out what we Affirmative Action babies have always known: not only are we not less qualified, but, in fact, we're far more qualified than many of the covert beneficiaries of access … except we're the only ones who've and been made to feel bad and/or be questioned about it.…

So where does this leave us? With yet another social proof of a reality that we have long denied/downplayed and with which we must grapple: the (increasing) class- and race-based inequality in our society (and, indeed, world). Simply put, despite the flowery words of our founding documents, this country was designed to be and has been fundamentally inequitable, especially with respect to the allocation of assets and opportunity, throughout its history. It has always favored the rich and powerful - who, again, it must be noted, are virtually exclusively white - over the rest of us.

In fact, it's a cruel irony indeed that the rights ascribed to American citizens in those founding documents were actually conceived to apply only to white male landowners. Since then, of course, white men of all stations have garnered and enjoyed more of these rights than any other group, so ours remains a fundamentally unequal - and, in many cases, largely separate - society. This reality has propelled two opposing trends in the aftermath of the Civil Rights Movement a half-century ago: increasing access afforded to People of Color (including via Affirmative Action for small portion of them) and a backlash against their progress from whites who've felt threatened by it.

How else can we explain the frightening and damning paradox that after our country elected its first African-American president, it then elected one of its most profoundly bigoted? And while the cynical and politically powerful (and, again, virtually exclusively white) would have you focus on terrorism by brown people of a different religion, the reality is that virtually all terrorism that we've experienced in our country in the last decade has been perpetrated by alienated white males, in no small part emboldened by our current abhorrent president (and in reaction to our previous one who was markedly different in a very obvious way), though there is a deafening silence about the latter reality in our national discourse (at least from the members of one group within our political leadership).

What's sad is that this is all so very simple. The truth is that we need to accept and address three realities about our situation in order to make ours a better country for us all:

First, we must acknowledge that we all want the American Dream, and especially want it to be true and attainable for our children.

Second, we must acknowledge the profound inequality in our society that has made that American Dream but a cruel fantasy for all but the very few at present.

Third, we must provide more equitable access to opportunity in all its forms - educational, professional, social, etc. - which has to mean that we will offer opportunities to the historically disadvantaged for a period of time until it can be proven that the they are no longer excluded by virtue of some immutable characteristic.

Oh, yeah: we also need to acknowledge and address a fourth reality about our society: the time for more equitable access has in no way, shape or form passed. As this college cheating scandal has reminded us, the rich, white and powerful continue to play by a very different set of rules than that available to the rest of us. And despite the cynical tropes propagated in the right wing media, Chris Rock's wry observation is still true: even though he's rich, because he's Black, there are very few whites who would actually trade places with him. So, too, with respect to Richard Pryor's incisive social commentary-cum-comedy of almost a half-century ago to the effect that whites and People of Color tend to have very different - if not polar opposite - experiences of and relationships with the police in far too many communities across this country. And the 'debate' we are having about whether we should honor or disassociate ourselves from the secessionist, treasonous leaders of the Lost Cause who are memorialized in marble and iron in places of honor across our country? And the appalling and immoral exclusion of transgender citizens from equality in serving in our military. And the immoral treatment of the asylum seekers - and especially the youngest, most vulnerable ones - at our borders. And.... These (and so/too many more) are the 'quiet costs' of White Supremacy that must be eradicated before we can be and are all equal heirs to our professed creeds.…

And despite all evidence to the contrary, I must admit a fundamental hope and confidence that I cannot shake: I believe ours will become a far more equitable society in the decades ahead. I know that it will be challenging and fraught with both great progress and troubling regressions, but the trend is so clear to me. When I look at the social engagement of our youth, our most diverse generation yet, I am heartened and inspired to hope that they will make good on the promise of a better world that they represent. And I am comforted by the demographic reality that ours will be a 'majority minority' country in a generation or so: I can't help but believe that the growing numbers of People of Color will virtually force the much-needed if challenging dialogue about how we allocate opportunity in our society. Don't get me wrong, I'm well aware of the myriad issues and developments that could derail us, but I'm even more persuaded by the trajectory of our recent history: the America in which I have lived is a far better one than that experienced by my parents and grandparents, which gives me faith that, in meaningful part but not likely totally, my children and grandchildren - and yours, too! - will experience an even better country in their lifetimes. A perfect one? By no means. But a more equitable and just one? Almost certainly ... if they vote, that is....

I would like to be known as a person

who is concerned about freedom and

equality and justice and prosperity

for all people.

 - Rosa Parks